The MINT Prjct
THE podcast to elevate your knowledge on pregnancy & postpartum fitness, nutrition and more along with parenting, business and advice to keep you living your best life. MINT stands for Motherhood In New Terms and we are so excited to begin bringing you fresh content in regards to all things motherhood, fitness, parenting, nutrition and so much more in a new way that is raw, unfiltered and hopefully refreshing. We are 3 gym owners, coaches, moms coming together from 3 different time zones to lay down some real talk when it comes to training through pregnancy along with a variety of other topics. Our goal is to remove the stigmas, clear the confusion, empower moms and trainers, and have some fun while doing it.
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The MINT Prjct
Back to School with The MINT Gals
Today Betsy, Jess & Cara get insanely real the back-to-school hustle, morning and bedtime routines, and homeschooling adventures. Our homeschooling mama, Cara, shares her decision-making process and if you've been considering homeschooling or simply curious, you don't want to miss this. We also talk about the importance of preschool in fostering creativity and providing a break for mamas – it's a win-win!
Lastly, we tackle a topic that's often shoved under the rug – self-care for moms. Let's face it, we often grapple with guilt when we take time out for ourselves. Today the girls share strategies on how to navigate this tricky space, from family dinners to extracurricular activities for kids, and even resources like The MINT Prjct. If you need tips getting back in the groove, check this episode out!
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To learn more about The MINT Prjct and check out our programs and courses, head to TheMINTPrjct.com and follow us on Instagram, as well as your hosts, @bets.inthewild, @_coach.cara_ and @jesscarr.fit
If you're a busy mom who wants to get strong, keep up with your kiddos, not to mention look and feel amazing without spending hours in the gym, we have good news. Our program, mom's Strong by Mint, strength and Conditioning, is the perfect program for all of the above. Designed with the busy mom in mind, this four day a week program can be done at the gym or at home during nap time in 45 minutes. It is time to get mom strong. For all the details, head to themitprojectcom. All right, welcome back to the Mint Project podcast. You've got all three of the girls here today. Today we're going to be talking about Back to School, which is happening all over the place. Some kids are back to school, I know some are not, but before we get started today, I wanted to give a quick shout out. There is a company that we started working with we actually had the co-founder on our podcast a few, maybe a month, ago called Gut Personal, and I am the first to tell you that I am very what's the word? A little super suspicious about supplements.
Speaker 2:Wary of supplements, that's a good word.
Speaker 1:I don't take a lot of supplements. I take creatine, some protein, once in a while, but was really struggling with gut bloating and all that kind of stuff and we had her on the podcast and she kind of convinced me which is challenging to try just a few things Like it wasn't like go take these eight million things and they're magical. The thing I love about them is like you take a quiz. It tells you what might be going on. You can also work with them one-on-one. Anyways, I started taking the magnesium, which is huge in sleep. You guys know I don't sleep very well, you don't sleep. I talked to Bethsine. I shared a room in Miami and I was up typing notes at three in the morning. Oh my God what are you doing?
Speaker 3:I can't be woken.
Speaker 1:To be fair, Bethsine is the sleeping beauty.
Speaker 2:She's got the opposite. It's a good thing we weren't all sharing a room, because with the baby and everything that would've- been bad.
Speaker 1:I probably would've. We probably would've been up at the same time.
Speaker 2:but yeah, that's true.
Speaker 1:But no, the magnesium has really been helping with sleep. And then I've been taking one other thing it's called the Healer which I think both are helping with my stomach, but I'm also like sometimes I'm guilty of having like a late night snack and so I've been drinking that instead and I feel like that's also helping like digest. Yeah, cause it. It's like you can do capsules, but they also have like a powder, which is what I've been doing and just making a little cocktail. But have you tried anything, betsy? I know you were looking at it.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I just. I just got, like a week ago, the magnesium capsules, which now I'm regretting and wishing I had the powder, because I'm coming up with all sorts of ideas in my head. But yeah, next time. I know she was talking a lot about how, like every single person they've tested is way deficient in magnesium. So yeah. But yeah, I took the quiz too and it told me the same thing. I think I'll also start the Healer, the bloat one, and then I think there's a greens product. They have too.
Speaker 1:Yes, there is, there is, so I also could just got blood work done. Actually, my magnesium now is normal, which probably a month ago it would not have been, and also you guys. My platelets, or whatever the blood clotting thing marker was, was also normal.
Speaker 3:So we don't know anymore For our listeners, in case you haven't heard and we've referenced this on a few podcasts Jess is a bleeder. Like you, don't cut that girl. She's not going to stop bleeding. It's really bad. So we were concerned. It's concerning yeah. All the things she needs to check.
Speaker 1:Yeah, probably. Yeah, a little paper cut and I'd be like drawing sharks to myself, oh my gosh. But I said it was normal, so I'm going to go with it. Good, that's good.
Speaker 2:I know we were all concerned we were all a little concerned.
Speaker 3:I was concerned. Yeah, what a place. Last year we were walking around with just like bloody ankle.
Speaker 1:I was really gross, that was really embarrassing.
Speaker 1:Oh anyways, anywho, all right. Well, it is back to school time. We all have children I know most of you listening have children, and so maybe you're going through some of this as well, or it is coming upon the time that your kids are going back to school, and so we thought we would all share some tips and tricks for managing this kind of crazy time of year, and all three of us are kind of managing both different ages and like different. We all have like a little bit of a different situation going on with school and how we're going about it and what grades they're in. So it should be, should be. You can take the little things from each of us, depending on where your kids are at, what grade they're in and all that good stuff. With that said, so, I have a fourth grader. She started the 23rd, which is really early for us and you guys why don't you guys just tell us right now Well, my kiddo started.
Speaker 3:he's three, about to be four, but we, for various reasons, he's going to go ahead to pre-K this year, which means not the same as day care. There's like a supply list, a long supply list. Yeah, so we'll get more into that. But yeah, mine's a pre-K back to schooler.
Speaker 1:So cute. You wear his little backpack.
Speaker 3:Yes, he must be carried with his backpack. Oh my God, well I have.
Speaker 2:I also have a preschooler and he's attending. It's like a Montessori, a Montessori style preschool. It's run by a friend and she does such a great job. My daughter went there for the last two years and so now it's my son's turn and he's really excited. And then I have a kindergartner and I am homeschooling her. So my goal is to homeschool my kids until well. We can have conversations earlier if they want, if they really want to go to school, but my thought is still about high school and then they can go full-time to high school if they want, or do part-time. That's just kind of the plan right now, but I'm really flexible with plans. So they want to do something.
Speaker 3:You are the most flexible.
Speaker 1:She is. We all say like if anyone's going to homeschool, kara's got the right personality for it.
Speaker 3:Oh gosh, I'll just send a crew to Utah and you can homeschool him too. Yeah right.
Speaker 1:Well, we'll get more into that, because I want to know more and I'm sure people who are considering homeschooling want to know more about how you made that decision, how you're doing it and what that looks like. But are you guys and you guys are newer to the first day of school but are you or do you think you're going to be a sad back-to-school mom? There's like two types of moms. You've seen the reels of the sad crying mom or the like toodaloo, see you later. Which one are you?
Speaker 2:For me. I just see it. I mean I don't have to say goodbye. They're here I can't really comment on this one, but I think I would be in between like a little bit sad to see them go, but I'm so excited. Yeah, oh, okay With him.
Speaker 3:I'm excited.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I'm just excited for him to go because he's pumped and then I get more time to focus on school. I need to do with Kaya.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I was. I'm like torn on the daily because I work from home and so does my husband, so we could juggle it if we needed to. Yeah, and I'm like, oh, it is literally an every day. The answer to this changes. But, generally speaking, I think now that he's been to daycare for before and then I had him home for a while, it was a hey bye, go. Go, do that he's also an only child.
Speaker 3:So I'm like okay, go get some socialization with other kids. Yes, let mama get a moment to not fight with you.
Speaker 2:Recharge.
Speaker 1:Yeah recharge. I know Same. I always say I'm like, okay, bye, I do get. I get a little bit sad, Like I remember. Now that she's older, it's kind of like all right, you need to go back to school yeah. Because at this point it's like she's wants to. Every day in the summer it's like what are we doing? Like I have to work, so like she, I mean she had stuff to do and like she went to friends house.
Speaker 1:She went to my mom's house a lot in the summer, but it is like a I do miss. In the summer the mornings are like much more chill, like we get up, I don't have to make lunches, she can just wear what she wants, and then we, I drop her off and I go to work, whereas school time is like a little bit more chaotic. Fast morning we get up, we eat breakfast, we pack a lunch and we are yelling to get out the door. So yeah.
Speaker 3:Why is there always so much yelling to get out the door. It's like, oh my God, it's the same thing every day. It's the same.
Speaker 1:Yes, what is taking so?
Speaker 2:long I'm like.
Speaker 1:I have Mila and I got and I it was one of those mornings where I actually felt really guilt, like bad after she left, because so this year I always take her to school. She goes to a private school, so she, they don't have buses. So I've always taken her and I love taking her to school. But we have one of her girls in her class lives in our neighborhood and I saw her mom the other day. We're like why don't we like carpool or like switch off some days, you take them some days, I'll take them some days. So I was like, yeah, so today was her turn to take them, and so of course is the one, not the one day, but usually we're pretty good about getting out the door on a certain time.
Speaker 1:So Mila comes down, she wears a uniform, so it's not the clothes aren't super challenging, but like it's been a little chilly in the morning, so she's been like wearing a sweater. Okay, we're going on day three of the same sweater, and so I'm like could you maybe pick a different sweater today and shoot? But I like this sweater, I know, but you have like seven other sweaters and we maybe don't want people to think you're just only have one sweater.
Speaker 2:Like I don't buy you more than that or like that.
Speaker 1:You're wearing the same sweater three days in a row. Like can we just literally just buy you and the one she's wearing is getting like you know, and they start pilling and stuff a little bit. So I'm like okay you have other things.
Speaker 1:So she's like crying, they pull up. She doesn't ever shoes on. I'm screaming, because then she goes to get the other sweater and she's up there for like five minutes. I'm like, what are you doing? What are you doing? It does not take that long to put on. She comes down. She's like, well, I had to get the tag off and, oh my God, so anyways. Then she's going out the door and then I'm, of course, like, oh God, now I feel so bad.
Speaker 2:I'm yelling at her as she walks out the door.
Speaker 1:So I'm like I'm sorry, I love you, and she's like okay, love you, bye, oh my God, mornings are hard. I know, but there I mean, there's a lot of days like that where, even like we get to school and something happens and we get, we're yelling at each other and then I'm like okay, I love you. Have a good day.
Speaker 2:Mornings are hard. Please, yeah, getting the places on time, getting in part of the house.
Speaker 1:They don't have a sense of time or urgency like that.
Speaker 2:We need to go somewhere, and it's like for a long time we could still kind of do this Every. I would wait till the last second, open the garage door and send them out to the car. And then I come out and they've ridden their bikes down the street. We're not going for a bike ride. I said get in the car. So I had to walk them through the scenario multiple times. They're getting better, but oh, for weeks I'm like chasing them around the neighborhood.
Speaker 3:Three. I can't imagine once you get it's like oh. I cannot. Oh my gosh, have y'all seen those? Those reels? Yeah, have y'all seen those reels, or whatever it's called? Lately we're especially in Texas. It's like a mom trying to open a stroller when none of the kids are listening. Everybody's crying, it's a hundred degrees outside and the stroller won't unfold. She's just oh.
Speaker 1:It just makes me want to cry.
Speaker 2:It's just like throw the stroller yeah, yeah, everything is yeah you have to laugh, cry yourself, because it's like crying helps you feel a little bit better, but it's not gonna help the situation and laughing can help you feel more better, so yeah, oh, you're good at the laughing.
Speaker 3:I need to adopt it.
Speaker 2:I just start yelling, are you?
Speaker 3:kidding me? Are you serious?
Speaker 2:I know one what are you doing? I'm not. I, I'm working on patients. That's my number one thing I need to work on.
Speaker 1:You're working on patients, me screaming up oh my god, yeah, I well, yeah, and like Mila is very she's concerned about if I don't wake her up by a certain time. She's usually up on her own. She's always been an early riser, but like if I don't get her up in time, she like panics that she doesn't have enough time to Chill for a little bit. Eat her breakfast, get ready, which I'm like. What do you? What takes so long to get ready? Like I'm just put these nine. You know what you need, you.
Speaker 2:She wears like a shahir put the same thing.
Speaker 1:What she's doing like what are you doing?
Speaker 2:But anyway.
Speaker 1:So I guess, some tips that, yeah, I need to work on myself is maybe prepping her lunch the night before because that's one thing that I thought about, because yeah, now I'm like, okay, I'm making her breakfast, my breakfast, trying to eat, trying to get her lunch, and then my dogs have this whole new food regimen that I'm basically cooking them a meal, like okay and yeah. And then, on top of like, I'm usually trying to do something on my computer in the morning, like to start the day. So I feel like I, I don't know, I don't love like prepping certain things for lunch the night before, because I feel like it gets kind of gross.
Speaker 1:But yeah at least having like the things that could be together and then also forcing her to pick out her sweaters the night before.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that that sounds like it would be.
Speaker 3:The sweater takes more time. It's a big decision, it's.
Speaker 2:I remember when we owned the gym and you know we would be going to the gym and In the morning and I'd have the kids eat their breakfast in the car on the way there and I always try and, yeah, prep the snacks, because all they did all day, you know, kids just eat non-stop.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so I'm just I'm all day and I've always found, yeah, if I could get them done the night before. I'm always so tired at night and that was like the last thing I wanted to do, but it was so helpful and getting us, yeah, at the door on time and yeah, that was just. It's hard to do for some reason, but it's so helpful.
Speaker 1:It. I know it's like you don't want to do it in the moment, but you're so glad the next day, like I'm always glad when, like I do the dishes at night. I hate going to bed when there's dishes in the sink and then waking up. And there's another thing that you have to add to your list. Like I Think when we had Ariel on the podcast she was talking about, like, keeping your house. Yeah, a low stress.
Speaker 2:As close as you can.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, yeah there's always gonna be things, but yeah, I guess Morning the routine less chaotic, which I need to work on for sure.
Speaker 3:Actually just had this conversation with Andre last night, because it used to be my husband would wake up before everyone have some alone time. My son would wake up, he, andre, would handle him for a little bit, and then I would wake up, and then it would be like time to get ready. Well, my sweet little niece, my sweet 16 year old niece, wants to work out. It wants to work out. She wants to work out at 5 30 in the morning. Guys, I'm dying.
Speaker 3:Dying because she's getting up at that time, I Feel like I have to support her through this right like really. It, and it's in my backyard, so I might as well, although it is torture, so now. So now, crew, once we're both awake, is getting up like a full hour earlier and the routine Hasn't changed.
Speaker 3:She just sits around and watches yeah watch this stuff for a while, but I said, okay, we've got to get a. The second he wakes up when he goes to the bathroom. He also puts his clothes on and brushes his teeth, because yeah, it's just Sobbing through teeth brushing today as I pride his mouth open because and I was like we have to go, we can't fight about this.
Speaker 3:Getting the important stuff done First is starting to seem like okay, that might make more sense, so that then there's not like Last minute stuff that has to be done before you walk out the door. So we'll see. We'll see if that worked. It's so true and yeah, part of today.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and part of today was my fault too, because I was on my computer and then I looked at the time and I was like, oh my god, they're gonna be here. And then she came down in the sweater and I was like, okay.
Speaker 1:So, the other thing that at least has to change for us. I know when she was little like her bedtime didn't change much in the summer, it just maybe once in a while it shifted back a little bit. But now that she's older it's like all summer she's been staying up basically with me. We go to bed at the same time, which has been nice, but also like I've really missed that okay.
Speaker 1:You don't get your little about 8, 30 and then I have some time to chill after you go to bed. Um, that shift has been. It's been good, like it hasn't been super hard, but Just one of those other like try to have to implement.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, you have to start earlier, like you can't tomorrow school.
Speaker 3:Here. What do you y'all do for bedtime with three different ages? I know that probably sounds like not a big deal to you, but yeah, it just sounds like.
Speaker 2:Well, this is Ray Ray Ray's, the more the person that loves the schedules and things like that. So 8, 30, 8, 30 it's supposed to be when Jack and Kai go to bed. Over the summer it's been more closer, it's been closer to nine and recently it's been closer to nine. They wake up regardless around six six no matter what time they go to bed, but it just depends on how much sleep they get. A la, I usually put her down. I'm gonna say 7, 30 and Ray's gonna say anywhere between seven and eight thirty.
Speaker 2:Which eight thirty is not? Yeah, anytime, between seven and eight. It's supposed to be around seven thirty. She's goes to bed and the other two 8, 30 slash 9.
Speaker 1:So yeah, it's supposed to be Seven and 8 30 but so she kind of you get her down first and then the other two kind of similar times.
Speaker 2:Yeah, she's just ready for bed by then. So yeah, it does make it easier. Then I can have my time with her, because I mean I'm weaning her but I'm still nursing her to sleep at night. Just, she doesn't need it, I need it, I guess I yeah fun little time with her. So yeah, so that's fun, so I do that, and then the rest of the bedtime stuff, so kind of bed time long bedtime routine.
Speaker 3:It's like the whole after a whole evening. Yeah, you and Ray get to stay up for a little bit and hang out after, or are you like? Ready for bed by then.
Speaker 2:Um, it depends. Usually we stay up, we don't. We should go to bed earlier, but usually we go to bed around 11.
Speaker 1:So yeah, yeah, oh, my God, I've been going to bed so early lately. It's like no, it's so wonderful yeah.
Speaker 3:Oh my gosh, I'm at medium.
Speaker 1:Yeah, how's your?
Speaker 3:bedtime routine, bets. Well, it's funny. You say you've been going to bed early. Last night I changed you know how I'm new to iPhones and maybe this has always been around but if you set your like sleep goal up for, let's say, eight and a half hours or eight hours, it's going to say, okay, well, if you go to bed at this time, this is your wait time. Or if you need to wake up, yes, when you go to bed, and it automatically adjusts it. Well, I adjust my alarm last night for the five am Wake up for this morning's workout and it said I needed to go to bed at eight. I was like, well, that didn't happen.
Speaker 2:And it never will.
Speaker 3:That's early. That's early. No, but crew has been. We just crew sleep. Going to bed is like the worst part of it.
Speaker 2:He just hates going to bed.
Speaker 3:He hates not being with us and missing out on anything, I think. And just he gets in our bed in the middle of the night, every night and so he just wants to get up all night.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 3:So I don't care if he does in the middle of the night, because it's sweet and I mean I kind of care. But yeah, going to bed, we have tried to be super, super strict about okay, we eat dinner. Sometimes he goes and plays outside, but then once it's bath time, that's bath or shower books, bed.
Speaker 2:But now it's turned into.
Speaker 3:Okay, I know, once bath is coming and even once dinner's coming, this is the start of the routine.
Speaker 1:It's like anxiety, almost a longer fight and because now we're fighting about eating dinner and going to bath, so I have no advice for a bed time routine.
Speaker 3:I did all the things, all the books, said yeah, I've also tried just saying forget it, you can just run around. My mom put him to bed one night at her house and said okay this is such a good story, yeah.
Speaker 3:She. We were having trouble with him staying in the bed, and this is when we were still trying to fight it, and she was like I said, mom, I just keep him in his bed. That's all I ask is like hopefully we're doing good at home, Hopefully you can keep him in the bed, yeah. So she said okay, crew, I'll turn on cartoons for you and you can just watch TV till you fall asleep. That way, she goes in there at three AM and he's just sitting up staring at.
Speaker 2:Gabby's dollhouse oh my gosh, I think I was there when this happened and I was like, yeah, I went in at three and he was still awake.
Speaker 3:I'm like that's asking me this. Are you kidding? Me yeah, so my kid is not the kid who will just like tire himself out and then fall asleep on the couch.
Speaker 2:No, he's not about to do that.
Speaker 3:He's strong. He's not going to shut his eyes.
Speaker 1:He's going to watch a show oh my God, he's like this is amazing.
Speaker 2:Fine hours, plus of hours and hours of TV.
Speaker 1:I can't believe he stayed up that long, and so I have no advice, no advice for Ben Well my only advice be having an older kid is that it will not last forever.
Speaker 2:It is.
Speaker 1:Mila. Mila had so many random pieces where she was never a good sleeper Like she. Oh, she did always go to bed, but she was like a waker. She woke up last night and was like I'm having bad dreams twice.
Speaker 3:So she's so funny.
Speaker 1:She's so new. Oh, my God, I laid in there, literally. I was already up, I think, when she called me and uh, and now she texts me because she knows that she's in my fave, she's in my like favorite, so it will go off.
Speaker 1:And uh, she's like she called. She yelled for me first and then I put her back to bed and then she texted me that she had another bad dream and in there. But, um, most of the time she does sleep through the night, for everyone freaking out that their nine year old still wakes up, but most of the night, yes, but you know, I feel like it's just they. Well, he's not going to sleep in your bed forever, Someone.
Speaker 1:I mean that once he's not going to you know, not want to go to bed forever, like yeah, he's still little but it's hard. That doesn't make it any easier.
Speaker 3:I'm supposed to go to bed at eight, 30. Please give me five.
Speaker 1:Yeah, just tell him that. My look my phone says I have to go to bed.
Speaker 2:It's mom's bedtime too. It'll get better.
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Speaker 3:So, kara, how'd you like? You are homeschooling and we're we're like getting to send the kids away and you are how did you make this decision? That's a big call, like I know. It's a big call. I feel that way.
Speaker 2:So, um, I was home school growing up and yeah, so I kind of have it wasn't. When I was thinking about it, it was a little bit overwhelming, but not as overwhelming, I think, as someone who would approach it coming from no experience. So I was home growing up. My mom, I'm all this eight, almost all of us were homeschooled from the beginning till about high school. I have a brother with Down syndrome, so he went to special education, um, at public school, which was great for him, um, but yeah, so I spent most of my life doing that. And then, um, I always said it's like I'm not going to do this, I'm not going to let my kids go to school, because for some reason I thought I missed out on all this stuff, when in reality, like when I was in high school, I did all the sports I wanted through the high school and went to dances.
Speaker 2:Like I did this stuff, you know, and yeah, I know I missed out on some things, but yeah, but like I'm fine, you know, I don't look back and like regret it anymore, like I'm okay, um so. But yeah, I was always like, no, I'm not going to home school with my kids. Plus, I just knew how much of a sacrifice it was. Like it's a lot, um, but yeah, I then I had my first kid and I was like, oh, maybe I will. And then, you know, things are just getting crazy and and so I started to think, well, maybe I'll homeschool because I'm just nervous about you know what's going on. You never know, like what kids are learning, or from their teachers, or from other kids and stuff. And I just thought like I want to be able to influence my children as long as possible and really teach them who they are so that they're really confident going out into the world. And so my first thoughts around it was like fear-based.
Speaker 2:And then my cousin actually has a podcast called the homeschool dropout and he had me on there and we were talking and stuff. And then I was listening to a few of his episodes and it's for parents who are thinking of homeschooling or who are currently homeschooling. You need more tips and tricks or like just the belief that things are gonna be okay with that. And there was an episode where a girl said that she he grew up, her mom homeschooled her out of fear, but that she's homeschooling her kids out of like Possibilities. And so I changed my mindset earlier this year and I was like I want to do this because there's so much more possibility for me, for our family, in homeschooling.
Speaker 2:So like, if my daughter loves, she loves like coloring and stuff like that, she can do way more of that. Or if she's way into math, we can go as far in math as she wants and we don't have to be back because this is your grade level. You have to stay here. If she struggles with reading, I don't want her being told You're actually behind in reading, because then she's listening all the time. I'm behind and behind Instead of just I'm working on this, you know. And then there's like so many more opportunities and I I also believe that like being outside and being active and learning like through with your whole body and like physically, is really important, and we spend a lot of our days outside. We always try and go either to the park or to the lake or on a hike every day, depending on the weather, and I live in a really hot place, so usually like if it's raining, we're still going outside because we love the rain.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I love that y'all go to the lake though. That's helpful.
Speaker 2:Yeah, there's just a lot, a lot of opportunity where we live to do that kind of stuff, and so that's kind of how I've been approaching it and I also think you know she's five, she doesn't need to go to school all day where we've been getting everything done in like two, two and a half hours, yeah, and then she can just play the rest of the day and and For me and for my family and my kids, I just believe that, like, play is so important and we we stop that we like extinguish that out of kids really early and get them over scheduled and just so much going on.
Speaker 2:So that was kind of my goal with it just to have more think outside the box possibilities for my kids as well, as, hopefully, I am doing a good job in stealing the values that I believe in into her For as long as possible, because they do want my kids, by the time they leave, to have the house, to be confident, to be, you know, have life skills as well. I feel like school could do a better job at teaching life skills. Yeah, and just to have something that she's passionate in, that she knows how to learn, she knows how, like she loves this subject. She knows how to go and really just dive into it, instead of being like kind of forced into these. While you have to do this, you have to do this, yeah, so that I want it to be more of like I want to do this. I'm really interested in this, so that's my vision With that.
Speaker 3:You want to be here when you grow up.
Speaker 1:And could you also like, just yeah, like, send our kid. We could be like.
Speaker 3:You offer virtual services.
Speaker 2:I told everyone like my friends and stuff because everyone you know at the end.
Speaker 2:It was hard too, because at the beginning of the year, like all of Kai's friends and my mom friends are like they're so excited for school and I'm excited to send them off and stuff and it's gonna be nice to have time to myself again, and I was kind of like, but at least like nothing's gonna change. It's always been like this. It's not like she's been in school and now I'm taking her out. I feel like that would have been harder. So I'm like, oh, things are just gonna be how they always are. Yeah, so that was a little bit hard. But so I started telling people she's going to the Forester Academy that's my last name for a second and I'm like it's very prestigious. You have to be a certain family To come to the school, because I'm not teaching other people's kids like I've already like I told you working on patients with my own.
Speaker 3:Yeah, Along with the patients. For that I have so many questions, two of them, okay. So first with patients. How did you decide then if jack is going to a preschool, to not just homeschool, for that stage as well? And same thing with kaya.
Speaker 2:Yeah, sorry, so my feed cut out, but I'm guessing you're asking why I decided to do preschool instead of just yeah, you did preschool and homeschooling for kindergarten, so how'd you make that call?
Speaker 2:Well, it was kind of like most of the things I do. Someone told me about it. My friend, my client, my friend Um, she has twins kaya's age, and she's like One of my best friends in my neighborhood. She's opening up a at-home preschool, like, do you want to put kaya in? And I was thinking, oh my gosh already, because she was two and a half when you had to like Register her for it. Oh yeah, it was like really, she's like, yeah, they go when they're three.
Speaker 2:It felt, holy cow, this is starting. I'm not ready for all of this yet and so I thought, could it hurt? And I, and then I met the teacher and I loved the teacher and I've told this teacher I'm like, if you would teach all grades, I just send my kids to your house, like for their schooling. But I just really love her. I love she's very creative, she's very like musical Um, and she has a lot of play. She has like animals at her house that the kids can play with, yes, and stuff like that and so, um. So that's kind of where that decision came from. All right, a little interruption. Okay, see ya, thank you, I love that news. So that's how I decided to do the preschool thing, and then she just loved it so much that I just kept her in it for the whole time. Um, and it's only three and a half or two and a half hours, three times a week.
Speaker 2:Yeah so again it hits that they're not there all day, um and stuff like that. It has a lot of play involved, which is also things I believe in. So, yeah, I, I just it works out. And now it's nice because Jack will be going to preschool, mm-hmm, so I can spend more one-on-one time with kaya while she's so young and while she's learning how to read, because I remember growing up, like as soon as I was proficient in reading, I'm pretty much doing everything, yeah, but my mom's there, she's writing. She did a lot still don't like she did a lot, but she didn't have to sit with you, sign and you exactly.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you can read the assignment or whatever you're doing, yeah.
Speaker 2:So by the time Jackson kindergarten hopefully kaya is closer to that.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I love that. I feel like it's becoming a bigger thing than it used to be, not only because, obviously there's a lot going on in our world in the school system, but Also, like you said, like the way that our kids are taught.
Speaker 1:I I think our Education system is like really flawed. I do like sitting in a desk all day as a kid is just so hard for most kids. Like you said, like activity is so important. I think Mila is down to like one recess now in fourth grade and it might be, she's still so young like yeah you know they get like 15 minutes to eat their lunch.
Speaker 1:Like everything's so rush. And as much as I love her school, like we chose her school um, probably similar, like you said in the beginning, like I love, I put her. She started preschool there when she was like three, three, three year old preschool and I was like, oh, probably around kindergarten, she'll move just to the public schools or whatever.
Speaker 1:And then we just like loved her school and then the covid stuff happened and a lot of it for me was like the way they handled that was a lot different than the way the public schools were handling it. We were super confident in what they were doing. Um, but with that said, like I know, I love what you're saying and I've heard this from other people who are homeschooling or, like I've heard it called, unschooling of like we go two places to learn.
Speaker 1:Like if we're gonna learn about money, we go to the bank and we learn about money. Or if we're learning about math, maybe it's actually going somewhere and learning about math. Like that's so cool to me. But yeah, I love everything you said. I wish I don't know how it even starts Like we start implementing changes in our school or if that will ever happen, but it like we need a whole podcast on just school.
Speaker 3:Yeah it's true, systems and homeschool and choices.
Speaker 1:Yeah, like Kaya might learn differently than someone else, or she might be better at this and wants to focus more on this. Like you don't get that in school. It's like, okay, we're doing this for 15 minutes and then we're moving on. Well, and you have one teacher with how many kids like?
Speaker 2:I don't blame the teachers, like that sounds. I don't know how you would do that, but I think, yeah, there's things that we could do, but this is what I'm, I've decided to for our family, and again too, ray and I, before we had kids, always thought it would be really cool to like get a bus or an RV and just take a year off and travel around the US. Not that you could you couldn't hit everything in one year, obviously but what a cool thing to do like with our kids. I think it would be cool if, like, kai was around 10 so she could remember it, and we have an eight year old and a six year old and who knows what else. I don't know. But and yeah, and just that's our learning for the year. You know, you want to learn about the revolutionary or go to that area you want to hit all the national parks.
Speaker 2:You do that. There's just so much, like I said, possibility. There's just endless.
Speaker 1:Where did you get? Is there like a curriculum that you like? I know there's some types of laws surrounding homeschooling, or are there like rules of what you have to cover in certain grades?
Speaker 2:So it depends, it depends. So right now I there's different like. So schools public schools get a certain amount of money for each child that's enrolled, but if you are homeschooling, you can apply for that money from the state, and if you get that, there are certain things that you need to follow. Hi, I applied too late, of course, and so I'm not gonna get it till January, till half the year, so I'm not like beholden really to anything right now. We're just doing what we want. But I'm following a certain curriculum that I found that we're trying it out this year and I love it so far and they have, you know, different. They have like kindergarten and then a bunch of like this is what we suggest to do for kindergarten, and I just got it all and it's been really great, yeah, so there's a lot of different things you kind of probably should check, depending on which state or where you live.
Speaker 2:You're staying in, but yeah, I know, once I start getting that state funded money, there will be certain things I have to do, but I've talked to other. There's tons of homeschoolers here, by the way. Like there's almost my cousin homeschools here and she's like just so you know, there's almost too many groups to join. Like don't join every group.
Speaker 2:Yeah there's just a lot of opportunity and so. But she was telling me, like with the one that I'm gonna, that I applied for for January, like just every week you have to go in and just say did they do math this week? Not even how much? Did they do math? Yes. Did they do writing?
Speaker 2:Yes, they just want to know, like yeah you know that something's being done and but yeah, so and I don't really know, like once she gets older, if she has to do the state testing. If I'm getting state money, I'm not sure that's something that I need to look into.
Speaker 3:So so being not only a homeschool mom, which leaves even less time when your kid is not in the house, whether you're working at home or working elsewhere. Like, how do all of you get your time, your family time, your one-on-one time, your fitness time? Like how do you still make time for that through now, kids being either gone the entire day or you being with them the entire day? I think it's all different for Kara than it might be for Jess and I, but kind of both into the spectrum.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I mean, for me it's like I definitely have to plan out my day If I just try to wing it and oh, I'll get my work done and then I'll work out, or whatever I don't. I get a little overwhelmed if I look at the whole week, but if I at least look at tomorrow and I look at okay.
Speaker 1:I have a client at this time. This is when I'm gonna work out. I at least make that decision the night before. This is when I'm gonna work out. This is when I'm gonna get my work done. This is when I have meetings, and then Mila has soccer or whatever, and then at some point like especially during the school year okay, she goes to bed a little bit earlier, so I'll at least have some time after that to kind of catch up on house stuff and then chill for a little bit.
Speaker 1:But like I think planning ahead is so key. Like leaving it till the day and just hoping that you'll find time to work out. I think most of us know like doesn't happen, but it does not work. But you're so good at planning.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I feel like both of you guys are good at planning. I'm not so good at planning. I'm getting better, though, because I have to.
Speaker 3:Also, how do you do it, then how do you like get time for yourself? You have a lot of kind of family time during the day, but then when Ray gets home or even just when you need some alone time.
Speaker 2:Yeah, Lately, like I've been putting, we put the kids to bed. It's been kind of hard because Kaya always wants me to just lay down with her until she falls asleep.
Speaker 3:And like.
Speaker 2:I want to but yeah, that doesn't work Like.
Speaker 2:that's usually when I'm trying to get work done or I just need to be alone for a little bit, and so I'm just like I'll lay with her for a little bit, sing the song, and then just I have to just go. She goes like can you please say? I'm like no, like I need my alone time. And so I usually Ray is usually watching a show by then I go into our room and just do I. Usually I try and like meditate Ryan, and journal, like, read some scriptures, like every day, and so that's usually when I've been getting it in. I should get it in first thing, but I'm like from the moment I wake up they're awake. So yeah, yeah, so that's when, I try and get it in.
Speaker 2:I'm gonna get an 8.30. Yeah, right, I know, and so that's been kind of my alone time. But also, even though my kids are always around when I work out, I figure that's Miami time too and they're just gonna be there for now. And I actually today, while I was working out, they were all around me and I had to create like a little playpen area with the bench and some boxes.
Speaker 2:Yes, cause I was doing some heavy deadlifts, I didn't want the baby crawling under me and then I just thought like they're all here, but I wasn't annoyed about it, like I was just like you know what they're not always gonna all be here and want to be like here, and while they're here, I want to. What am I trying to model for them? You know, I'm trying to show them like healthy habits, that I'm doing what I can when I can and that it's fun, and I'm just trying to stay strong. And I don't always feel like that. Sometimes I'm like please get out of the gym, but today I feel good, so it just yeah, it kind of depends, but I try and take just a little bit, at least half an hour or an hour in my room by myself after I put the kids to bed every night.
Speaker 1:I think that's important to know. That's okay, tudor Cause. Sometimes still Bila will be like can you lay with me for? A minute and like sometimes I do like you said and sometimes I'm like I can't tonight and like there's that little bit of guilt that hits. Oh, god, she's not always gonna want me to lay with her. I should have laid with her.
Speaker 1:And then I was like you know, like you need what you need as a mom sometimes too, especially to wake up, refresh the next day and do it all over again with patience. So I think it's important to hear that and like also having that mindset of like okay, maybe my kids are here when I'm working out, but it's still my time, and then it sounds like they've learned to kind of like do their own thing when mom's getting her work out, in which, like that's cool to teach them too, Like mom's here if it's an emergency, but like talk amongst yourselves for 45 minutes.
Speaker 3:Yeah, independent play is so important and it's like of course they have each other, which is helpful too. But not feeling like you have to always entertain them. I feel like can make or break a kids being home all day, like if you're having to yeah, no, I do not feel like I have to entertain my kids.
Speaker 3:That would be maddening. And I think with what you said, Jess, about the guilt, like we all experience it literally every night when he fights and wants me to stay, wants me to go to bed with him and lay with him and come check on him 26 times. Then, an hour or two later, I'm like dang, I miss him. Or every day I send him to school. I think, dang, I feel guilty, I should have kept him at home. I'm gonna miss this time. I'm gonna wish I had more time with him as a little baby.
Speaker 3:But what I've realized is that I feel like that through every single stage and, Karen, I'm sure you can attest to like it doesn't matter how much of that you get, how many times like you lay with them, how many times you say yes, how much extra time you get with them, it will never be enough.
Speaker 3:You will never get your fill of this age or this stage. So I think it's important to try to remind yourself that it's not only okay to do it, to take time for yourself, but also that you'll never that feeling of quote unquote guilt will never leave, because you'll never get your cups, you'll never get the fill of your kid, you can never get enough of them.
Speaker 2:So when you do have your own time, like, be like you know, it's okay. I did spend time with them today, I did do this stuff, but it's okay also, and it motivates you to be patient the next time you're with them. You're more present. Yeah, I agree, You're more present because you've had that reboot. Yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I was gonna say, if you haven't listened to our podcast on mom guilt, we did a full episode on it, so go because we could talk about it.
Speaker 1:We did talk about it for an hour, so go back and listen to that. If that's something you struggle with, we all do. But I was also thinking like back to school. Time also means for us like soccer starts back up and there's school activities, and so not just the school but like the after school. So like how do we make sure that we're still getting that time? And I know, betsy, you've talked a lot about having like family dinners and I think that's one way that can be really important, that just making sure your kids are sitting down with you and talking about their day.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I love that.
Speaker 1:I thought it was really cute. I think it was for Mother's Day, mila's school at school they made this little jar for dinner time and it was like you pulled out a topic to talk about cause sometimes it's like pulling teeth you know, like, what'd you do at school today? Yeah, I don't know.
Speaker 3:I don't think. Okay, I asked crew what did you learn Nothing.
Speaker 2:What'd you?
Speaker 1:do I don't know? Yeah, yeah, I know I'm like Mila, what'd you do Math? Like yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm like division or, but it has, like you know, like different topics, like who'd you sit with at school, like what did they tell you, like you know. So that's a fun idea If you're sitting at dinner and it's like no one's talking to each other.
Speaker 2:I love that. That's really cool.
Speaker 1:Yeah me too, yeah, and then using like extracurricular activities for also some self-care, like go for a walk I've started walking at Mila's soccer practice or I've just made a lot of friends with the parents, so like that's a time where, cause she does want me to watch a lot of the times, so it's like I'll stay and sit and watch, but also like chat with some of the other moms and that can kind of fill up your cup a little bit too. Yeah, at the team, but oh my gosh, I'm at this activity again. Just look at those little things too.
Speaker 3:Well, good to hear it doesn't necessarily get easier I don't think it ever does with any age, but just different man. It's good that you know. I know the three of us have each other with all this like huge wide range of not only ages but experiences and different raisings and different ways that we're parenting now. So that's helpful and I think for I hope that any mom listening to this kind of gets a lot of different perspectives to that they can see their own reflection in and get some ideas.
Speaker 1:Any other last minute thoughts, we good.
Speaker 2:Good luck with your back to school.
Speaker 1:Yes, back to school, All right, thanks for listening guys. Hey Mitt, mamas and trainers, if you enjoyed our information, you will love our programs and resources. We have a pregnancy fitness program, postpartum program, along with guides on movement modifications and nutrition, all designed to help you safely and effectively stay active through pregnancy and return to exercise postpartum. You can even bundle our programs and save so that your whole journey is covered. You can find all of these resources at themittprojectcom. 你.